“No need for me to apologize or get all teary-eyed, but my life could have been different if I had waited on God’s direction in my life
I found love, or so I thought I had. He was so handsome. He was everything I had wanted in a man. Great sex, handy around the house and he could cook. Enchilada’s, tacos, spaghetti, cornbread; yes, cornbread. I gained 30+ pounds from his cooking and his love
People around me saw the difference he made in my life and I flaunted how happy I was. We went every where together. The mall, movies, car shows, restaurants, you name it, we did it. Our life together was perfect
Well, so I thought.
See when you don’t rely on God’s guidance and move from the feelings inside your head, your heart and for your magazine’s sake, down below under the skirt, you can be easily steered away
Our romance lasted nearly 6 months before things went sour
He wasn’t jealous. He wasn’t abusive. He was just a liar. He lied about everything he had ever told me. He lied about working. He lied about having a degree. He lied, lied, lied and I became furious with him after each lie after another starting falling into my lap
I could have swallowed all of those lies, but what I couldn’t swallow was the lie about our relationship.
Now when I look back over our brief time together, it all makes sense. Those nights when he had to leave me because his boss needed him. Those weekends when he couldn’t be with me because of again, his boss. How could I had been so stupid, so desperate?
Well, needless to say, he was married and I was the other woman. The woman he played with. Had sex with. Lied to over and over!!!
It all came to an end when all I wanted him to do was confess he was married, but he kept lying to me and before I knew it I had stabbed him. In my fury, I stabbed him over and over. For each lie he had ever told me, but that wasn’t the right way to handle my fury, my disappointment
I am now sitting in a women’s prison for attempted murder, doing 20 years. I look back over my life and say to myself, why didn’t I wait on God? Why didn’t I consult Him and keep Him front and center? Why did I allow the enemy to bait me? There are a lot of why’s in my life, but I have nothing but time to find the answers. Well, maybe I already know the answers to all my why’s
I was just like you, wanting to be in a relationship so bad that I didn’t take the time to consult God.
I pray my testimony will encourage others to wait patiently on God. Pray for me aes I need your prayers – JS
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